RE: Date field's and their file space usage. -- RPG400-L

Thanks Charles... that was great!

Joel
http://www.rpgnext.com


On Wed, 2005-01-12 at 13:46, Wilt, Charles wrote:
> Here you go:
> 
> http://idiot-dog.com/humor/y10k.html
> 
> COBOL Forever
> 
> There was once a COBOL programmer in the mid to late 1990s. For the sake of 
> this story, we'll call him Jack. After years of being taken for granted and 
> treated as a technological dinosaur by all the UNIX programmers and 
> Client/Server programmers and website developers, Jack was finally getting 
> some respect. He'd become a private consultant specializing in Year 2000 
> conversions. He was working short-term assignments for prestige companies, 
> traveling all over the world on different assignments. He was working 70 and 
> 80 and even 90 hour weeks, but it was worth it.
> 
> Several years of this relentless, mind-numbing work had taken its toll on 
> Jack. He had problems sleeping and began having anxiety dreams about the Year 
> 2000. It had reached a point where even the thought of the year 2000 made him 
> nearly violent. He must have suffered some sort of breakdown, because all he 
> could think about was how he could avoid the year 2000 and all that came with 
> it.
> 
> Jack decided to contact a company that specialized in cryogenics. He made a 
> deal to have himself frozen until March 15th, 2000. This was very expensive 
> process and totally automated. He was thrilled. The next thing he would know 
> is he'd wake up in the year 2000; after the New Year celebrations and 
> computer debacles; after the leap day. Nothing else to worry about except 
> getting on with his life.
> 
> He was put into his cryogenic receptacle, the technicians set the revive 
> date, he was given injections to slow his heartbeat to a bare minimum, and 
> that was that.
> 
> The next thing that Jack saw was an enormous and very modern room filled with 
> excited people. They were all shouting "I can't believe it!" and "It's a 
> miracle" and "He's alive!". There were cameras (unlike any he'd ever seen) 
> and equipment that looked like it came out of a science fiction movie.
> 
> Someone who was obviously a spokesperson for the group stepped forward. Jack 
> couldn't contain his enthusiasm. "It is over?" he asked. "Is 2000 already 
> here? Are all the millennial parties and promotions and crises all over and 
> done with?"
> 
> The spokesman explained that there had been a problem with the programming of 
> the timer on Jack's cryogenic receptacle, it hadn't been year 2000 compliant. 
> It was actually eight thousand years later, not the year 2000. But the 
> spokesman told Jack that he shouldn't get excited; someone important wanted 
> to speak to him.
> 
> Suddenly a wall-sized projection screen displayed the image of a man that 
> remarkably looked very much like Bill Gates. This man was Prime Minister of 
> Earth. He told Jack not to be upset. That this was a wonderful time to be 
> alive. That there was world peace and no more starvation. That the space 
> program had been reinstated and there were colonies on the moon and on Mars. 
> That technology had advanced to such a degree that everyone had virtual 
> reality interfaces which allowed them to contact anyone else on the planet, 
> or to watch any entertainment, or to hear any music recorded anywhere.
> 
> "That sounds terrific," said Jack. "But I'm curious. Why is everybody so 
> interested in *me*?"
> 
> "Well," said the Prime Minister. "The year 10000 is just around the corner, 
> and it says in your files that you know COBOL...."
> 
> Charles Wilt
> iSeries Systems Administrator / Developer
> Mitsubishi Electric Automotive America
> ph: 513-573-4343
> fax: 513-398-1121