A few Gems ...

[Bob Angell <aims@xxxxxxx>]

These were passed to me, definitely NOT original by me (they are
too good!!).  As they relate to the AS/400 - just remember that when
you are "hip-deep" in SNA, TCP/IP and other such fun these should
bring a few smiles!!

On topic: Daylight savings time worked like a charm on my 40S 
running V3R7 - it is set to the proper time without ANY intervention
on my part.

-Bob-

---
A first grade teacher collected old, well-known proverbs.  She gave each
child in her class the first half of a proverb, and had them come up
with
the rest.

- As you  shall make your bed, so shall you. . .mess it up.
- Better be safe than. . .punch a 5th grader.
- A miss is as good as. . .a Mr.
- Strike while the. . .bug is close.
- It's always darkest before. . .daylight savings time.
- Never under estimate the power of. . .termites.
- You can't teach an old dog new. . .math.
- If you lie down with the dogs, you'll. . .stink in the morning.
- Love all, trust. . .me.
- The pen is mightier than the. . .pigs.
- An idle mind is. . .the best way to relax.
- Where there's smoke, there's. . .pollution.
- A penny saved is. . .not much.
- Two's company, three's. . .the Musketeers.
- Don't put off tomorrow what. . .you put on to go to bed.
- Laugh and the whole world laughs with you; cry and. . .you have to
blow
your nose.
- None are so blind as. . .Helen Keller.
- When the blind leadeth the blind. . .get out of the way.
- Don't bite the hand that. . .looks dirty.
- You can lead a horse to water but. . .How?

---
Things I've Learned from My Children (Honest and No Kidding)

     * There is no such thing as child-proofing your house.
     * If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with
        roller blades, they can ignite.
     * A four-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded
        restaurant.
     * If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
strong
        enough to rotate a 42-pound boy wearing Pound Puppy underwear
and a
        superman cape. It is strong enough however to spread paint on
all
        four walls of a 20-by-20 foot room.
     * Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
     * You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on.
     * When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball
up
       few times before you get a hit.
     * A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
     * The glass in windows (even double pane) doesn't stop a baseball
hit
       by a ceiling fan.
     * When you hear the toilet flush and the words "Uh-oh," it's
already
       too late.
     * Brake fluid mixed with Chlorox makes smoke, and lots of it.
     * A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though a
      36-year-old man says they can only do it in the movies.
     * A magnifying glass can start a fire even on an overcast day.
     * If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball shoes,
       it does not leak-it explodes.
     * A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. foot
       house 4 inches deep.
     * Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year-old.
     * Duplos will not.
     * Play Dough and Microwave should never be used in the same
sentence.
     * Super glue is forever.
     * McGyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
     * Ditto Tarzan.
     * No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool, you still
       can't walk on water.
     * Pool filters do not like Jell-O.
     * VCR's do not eject PB&J sandwiches even though TV commercials
show
       they do.
     * Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.
     * Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
     * You probably do not want to know what that odor is.
     * Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
     * Plastic toys do not like ovens.
     * The fire department in San Diego has at least a 5 minute response
       time.
     * The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earth worms
       dizzy.
     * It will, however, make cats dizzy.
     * Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.
     * Quiet does not necessarily mean don't worry.
 *** * A good sense of humor will get you through most problems in life
          (unfortunately, mostly in retrospect.)


-- 
   Bob Angell, Principal - Sys. Engineer/Author/Consultant
   Applied Info & Mgnt Sys, 1238 Fenway Ave., SLC, UT 84102 
   v801-583-8544 mailto:aimsllc@ibm.net mailto:aims@gte.net
 
   "Had Mama Cass and Karen Carpenter shared that Ham sand-
   wich; John Belushi just said "Pepsi, not coke!", they might
   all be with us today!!"
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