Speaking of Hell (Was Re: Area Codes (was Happy Birthday !))

[PaulMmn <PaulMmn@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>]

Subject:  FW: Hell (fwd)

>
>     Dr. Schambaugh teaches at the University of Oklahoma School of
>     Chemical Engineering and is known for asking questions such as "Why
>     do airplanes fly?" on his final exams.
>
>     The May 1997 - Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II - Final Exam
>     Question: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic?  Support your answer
>     with a proof."
>
>     Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law
>     or some variant.
>
>     One student, however, wrote the following:
>
>     First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some
>     mass.  If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass.  So, at
>     what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls
>     leaving?  I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to
>     hell, it will not leave.  Therefore, no souls are leaving.  As for
>     souls entering hell, let's look at the different religions that exist
>     in the world today.  Some of these religions state that if you are not
>     a member of their religion, you will go to hell.  Since there is more
>     than one of these religions, and people do not belong to more than one
>     religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell.
>     With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of
>     souls in hell to increase exponentially.
>
>     Now, we look at the rate of change of volume in hell.  Boyle's Law
>     states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay
>     the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay
>     constant.
>
>     #1 - So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which
>     souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will
>     increase until all hell breaks loose.
>
>     #2 - Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the
>     increase of souls in hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop
>     until hell freezes over.
>
>     So which is it?  If we accept the postulate given to me by Theresa
>     Banyan during my Freshman year - "that it will be a cold night in hell
>     before I go out with you" and taking into account the fact that I still
>     have NOT succeeded in getting a date with her, then #2 cannot be true....
>
>     Thus, hell is exothermic.
>
>     The student, Tim Graham, got the only A.
>

Well, -I- thought it was on-topic!  (:

--Paul E Musselman
PaulMmn@ix.netcom.com


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