Levity

Hi Ya'll

Just thought a little levity would be good.

There are three engineers in a car, an electrical engineer, a chemical engineer,
and a Microsoft engineer.   Suddenly the car just stops by the side of the road,
and the three engineers look at each other wondering what could be wrong.  The
electrical engineer suggests stripping down the electronics of the car and
trying to trace where a fault might have occurred.  The chemical engineer, not
knowing much about cars suggests that maybe the fuel is becoming emulsified and
getting blocked somewhere.  Then, the Microsoft engineer, not knowing much about
anything, comes up with a suggestion.  "Why don't we close all the windows,  Get
out  , get back in, open the windows again,  and maybe it will work"

I swear I heard that last one from the M'soft tech support line!
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Heres another one  for those support line people;

"Hello, welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline automated service,
"If you are obsessiev-complusive, please press 1 repeatedly.
"If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
"If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and  what you want.  
Just stay on the line until we trace the call.
"IF you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell 
you which number to press.
"IF you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press.  
NO one will answer."

If I offended anyone,  Then by my New York definition you have no sense of
Humor. (Right Al ?)

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This one is best done by Janet Kruger.   If you see here at COMMON have her
recite it. 

Computer Manual by Dr. Seuss

(With Apologies to Dr. Seuss
What  If Dr. Seuss Wrote Technical Training Manuals? )

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted cause the index doesnt hash,
Then your situations hopeless, and your systems gonna crash!

You cant say this?   What a shame sir!
Well find you another game sir!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
Thats repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall!

If your screen is all distorted by the side-effect of gauss,
So your icons in the window  are as wavy as a souse,
Then you may as well reboot, and go out with a bang,
Cause as sure as Im a poet, the suckers gonna hang!

If the copy of your floppys getting sloppy on the disc,
And the microcode instructions cause unnessasary RISC,
Then you have to flash your memory, and youll want to RAM your ROM,
Quickly turn off  the commputer and be sure to tell your MOM

Author Unknown


John P. Carr CDP
EdgeTech Inc. 

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